A Letter to My Ovaries
Dear Ovaries,
Are you high?
No.
NO.
NO.
Seriously, what is WRONG with you? The Squidgelet is only five weeks old... and yet you're telling me that two weeks ago you thought it would be a great time to start trying for another baby?
Didn't you get the memo? I thought breastfeeding was supposed to make you hibernate for at least 6 months.
I had stitches down there.
STITCHES.
Did you really think I was going to be interested in a little bow-chicka-wow-wow with stitches in my vajayjay? You really thought I would feel sexy enough to make sexy time with a deflating, flabby belly that flaps wildly in the lightest breeze?
Here, let me clear up the confusion:
No.
NO.
NO.
We are NOT having another baby anytime soon. So you can just put your little eggs away on the shelf for awhile.
Sincerely,
Becky
Are you high?
No.
NO.
NO.
Seriously, what is WRONG with you? The Squidgelet is only five weeks old... and yet you're telling me that two weeks ago you thought it would be a great time to start trying for another baby?
Didn't you get the memo? I thought breastfeeding was supposed to make you hibernate for at least 6 months.
I had stitches down there.
STITCHES.
Did you really think I was going to be interested in a little bow-chicka-wow-wow with stitches in my vajayjay? You really thought I would feel sexy enough to make sexy time with a deflating, flabby belly that flaps wildly in the lightest breeze?
Here, let me clear up the confusion:
No.
NO.
NO.
We are NOT having another baby anytime soon. So you can just put your little eggs away on the shelf for awhile.
Sincerely,
Becky
Labels: My Life
posted by Becky at
4:09 PM
2 Comments:
Dear Becky: insufficient postage, return to sender. La la la la la.
--O's.
Oh dear, you're like me. My body did that too - totally unfair.
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